(Photo Courtesy: Niecy Nash)
One Super Bowl Sunday, I put on my Pittsburgh Steelers sweats and was ready to root my hometown team to victory with my long-term boyfriend (and baby-to-be’s father). We previously RSVP’d to attend a friend’s football party, but when I called to confirm a time, he told me he had plans to watch the game at a get together hosted by an ex-girlfriend—without me. Although I knew our relationship was rocky, the news hit hard, as if a 300-pound lineman had tackled me. Before I got up, he dumped me over the telephone. In shock, I drove to his house to find out why my contract wasn’t being renewed. I then went to the party by myself to share the story with my cheerleaders–my best friends since middle school. We figured my daughter’s dad and I would reunite and work things out as we always did for nearly three years.
(Photo Courtesy: Rainforest Films)
Right now, casting is underway for Think Like a Man Too—the sequel to Steve Harvey’s hit comedy Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man. I wasn’t surprised when I heard the news, since women are always wondering what goes on in the minds of the opposite sex. Therefore, there will always be long lines outside of movie theaters that feature films finding an answer to our endless questions about relationships, love, commitment and intimacy.
When I was younger and played the “What Super Power Would You Wish For” game, I always wanted to be an invisible mind reader. I wanted to eavesdrop on my family’s conversations without being caught and peek into my neighbors’ lives in the privacy of their homes. I wanted to see if how they acted outside actually occurred inside. I didn’t hope to gain anything from it. I was just a bit nosey. As an adult, I still think that being an invisible mind reader would be a pretty awesome power to possess. I would definitely activate it and find out what’s really going on in the minds of men I meet.
Recently, I caught up with the film’s producer, Will Packer, to find out what he really thinks about dating. Fortunately, I didn’t need to be superwoman to get a glimpse inside his head.
(Photo Courtesy: Gary Antoine)
Recently, I packed up my old bridesmaid dresses and donated the clothes to charity. I knew I would never wear the gowns again, but for years, I liked to look at them hanging in my closet. The dresses reminded me of good times and good friends. As I placed each one in the bag–including the Vera Wang I had a hard time letting go of–I recalled jumping for joy each time my girlfriends jumped the broom. Most landed on solid foundations, but some fell face first onto shaky ground. I often helped them up and dusted them off. And although most people warn against it, I think singles should give their married friends relationship advice.
Recently, I met a man at a work-related event, who was attractive, articulate and intelligent. Throughout the morning, we locked eyes–each time in an uncomfortable yet intriguing type of way. I tried to focus on the speaker, but my mind kept wandering back to this mysterious man. When the event wrapped up, I lingered near the door, giving him a chance to approach me. He got the hint and sparked a conversation. We exchanged smiles and business cards. I suggested that we grab a cup of coffee if he was in the area again. About a month, several emails and a couple of phone calls later, we connected in person. I viewed it as a meeting–not a date.
I don’t think my life will end when I get married. I don’t think it will begin either. Perhaps the union will be the sequel, the to be continued or the happily ever after to my current single state of mind. I don’t live my life hoping and waiting for a husband. Yes, it would be nice if he comes riding in on a horse or in an environmentally friendly car, but he won’t bring happiness. I already have a smile on my face. Maybe he’ll turn it into a school girl grin that shows all my teeth. For now, I’m enjoying my journey. Relationships, and marriages, are hard work. So it’s nice to exhaust my energy on myself for now. Before I jump the broom, I hope to jump for joy when I complete my Before Marriage Bucket List. I urge all singles to create a checklist of their own. Feel free to steal some of my ideas!